This too shall pass…an Ode to a Kidney Stone

you are edgy

and O so pale

like a communion wafer

gone cold and stale…

I have nightmares about a Grecian Urn…somewhere in the deep recesses of dreamland, tucked away for a fit-filled night, lies a canister of dark cinematic Hell from the epitome of bad poetry. Not even  “Ode To A Ball of String Cheese” can top the throes of despair one encounters from this rancid tale of imaginary dancing nymphs. To put it bluntly, I would rather snort sweet tart dust than endure such drivel. “Ode to A Grecian Urn” ranks right up there with “Afternoon Delight” and Leonard Nimoy’s voice on “Ballad of Bilbo Baggins,” crushingly painful. And like the stabbing pains of a kidney stone, such bad poetry deserves to be flushed to points unknown…

…but ere I feel your stabbing pain

I’ll be off to use the toilet again

and so I feel that this shall pass

like flatulence amidst a class…

they’ll hear me scream

they’ll hear me roar

but not before I hit the floor

and though it sting and though it burn

at least it’s not “A Grecian Urn.”


About thelostkerryman

Thelostkerryman is an author, and entrepreneur- this side of Tir Na N'Og- living in the forests of a consistently confused country. Here in this hill country, hurling doesn't usually involve a hurley, store-made soda bread resembles an inedible Irish megalith, and Kerrygold is only found hidden like a luck penny in the belly of Kroger. His blogs are an account of his adventures, thoughts, eclectic -and eccentric- ramblings, random or insightful poetry, humor and non-humor, pictures (photos), video, essays, fiction, poetic fiction, nonfiction, drama, and writing he has not classified in the description above. All of his posts from,,, and are copywrited according to international copywrite law.
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One Response to This too shall pass…an Ode to a Kidney Stone

  1. free penny press says:

    Oiy vey. a kidney stone is as bad as a toothache..
    loved this bit of witty!

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