Baptizing the masses…in a clawfoot tub


When you’re in college, you do crazy things. You may ingest a half dozen donuts in half an hour, stay up 48 hours drinking motor-oil-flavored soda pop, or….baptize people in your bathtub. The latter occurred one night while I was dutifully working at the donut shop serving “Stoner Dogs” and “Jalapeno Flurries” to inebriated college youth. I came home to find the floor wet all around our tie-dye-bedspread- covered sofa in the living room. After placing my donut stash inside the refrigerator, I headed upstairs, following the trail of terribly large drops…to a soaked tile bathroom floor.

The light revealed more danger as I manuvered from one spot to another attempting to skirt the incident zone. Finally, gripping the side of our clawfoot tub, I discovered damp lint, curly hair, and what looked like an emptied bottle of anointing oil. It had all the earmarks of a serious Pentecostal Party.

I headed to my room, worn out from having to slap Stoner Dogs together at record pace to keep up with the night’s demand. I collapsed on my bed and fell asleep. When I woke, noon had passed and the house seemed quiet. I ambled down the stairs to find our resident journalism major sitting on the couch nonchalantly reading a textbook in the same area I discovered serious water damage in the wee hours of the night. When I asked him about the evidence, he said that several people had followed him home from a fellowship/worship service where a young man expressed the need to be baptized. Seizing on the opportunity, he had offered our bathtub…and a place on the sofa…

When I reflect on the antics of my housemates in those years, I am amused by how unpredictable our lives were. It seemed like we constantly entertained guests, had someone sleeping over on the couch, or sat up late doing crazy things like celebrating Millard Filmore’s Birthday with a Dart Contest, eating huge pots of Ramen-noodle Surprise and drinking Double Cola (legalized motor oil?). Those may have been “crazy days and crazy nights” but we never had to resort to drugs for our craziness, we just took the gospel literally…and creatively.

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About thelostkerryman

Thelostkerryman is an author, and entrepreneur- this side of Tir Na N'Og- living in the forests of a consistently confused country. Here in this hill country, hurling doesn't usually involve a hurley, store-made soda bread resembles an inedible Irish megalith, and Kerrygold is only found hidden like a luck penny in the belly of Kroger. His blogs are an account of his adventures, thoughts, eclectic -and eccentric- ramblings, random or insightful poetry, humor and non-humor, pictures (photos), video, essays, fiction, poetic fiction, nonfiction, drama, and writing he has not classified in the description above. All of his posts from thelostkerryman.wordpress.com, talesinastrangerstrangerland@wordpress.com, everydayasadisciple@wordpress.com, and mrandmrsboring.wordpress.com are copywrited according to international copywrite law.
This entry was posted in Christianity, Culture, Education, Food, humor, Life, Pentecostalism, Relationships and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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