this evening i have been reading some good poetry, from Kirsten Uninterrupted http://www.kirstenuninterrupted.wordpress.com
and The Forlorn Fairy ( http://www.eclecticdirections.wordpress.com ). i love their poetry and hope you will too…
i confess to feeling a little under the weather lately (since it is above me), sleeping more than 14 hours at a time and looking forward to the end of prescription side effects. while awake last night, i struggled writing a post that normally would take a matter of a half hour or hour at most. i revised like a hamster in a cage, like a hamster in a cage…like a hamster in a cage…until it sounded palatable…which got me to thinking about bad writing…particularly, bad poetry.
in order to understand truly good poetry, one must have been exposed to truly bad poetry. i have seen my share over the years, and indeed, i have -for amusement- written some just for the fun of it. for truly bad poetry (notice the trinity of trulys) all has one thing in common- it is easy to recognize, yet hard to define.
various sites online claim to have horrific poetry, but alas, one look tells me that some audience might actually love them. One would have to look for the inspired Douglas Adams’ garbled Vogon Poetry for any no-brainer-bad-poem…though there are many song lyrics worthy of such honor, beginning with Biber’s “Baby.”
But i was not satisfied with the internet examples, so I am trying my hand at it…inspired by pulling a carton of greek yogurt from the fridge, and discovering…to my dismay…the dreaded expiration date…
took you out of my refrigerator and noticed the label
warning my brain of catastrophe after March 19…
inside inedible, do you smell odoriferous?
or….or…or…do you taste like destiny?
eating you would be bad poetry
spooning you would be bad protocol
peeling your cover would make you naked,
exposed, expired, and a bit too lumpy
O, Yogurt, Sweet Pile of Unstrained Yogurt,
why do you slouch sideways in your plastic cup?
you spawn of Satan, go back to the place they made you
and rot with the other recyclables discarded in a hurry…
for you, O fetid Yogurt,
are much too furry.
note: the yogurt pictured above is not the disposed relic…